Nine years ago, I lost my sister, Cara. It’s hard to believe it’s only been nine years, but still it’s hard to believe it has been nine years. Times are, I think it was just yesterday; other times, it feels like a hundred years ago.
Not that I think of her every day, but not a week goes by that I don’t think of her and miss her. Then the ache feels fresh and raw.
So, nine years ago, I got a phone call from my father, in the hospital with Cara; we drove out faster than Norm has ever driven, with me pushing the car to go faster, faster, faster! I spent the last hours of her life holding her hand and talking to her, even though she couldn’t answer me back. But I know she heard me. But then she left.
Cara does come to me in dreams, occasionally and she is always smiling and laughing. Sometimes in my dreams, I know she is dead and sometimes she has come back to life but is living a secluded life and we have to go visit her. The last time she visited me, it was just before Candy and I went to the folks to help them move. Cara had a message for me to tell everyone but like a dummy, I didn’t write it down when I woke up and so I couldn’t remember it.
However, when all of us were together for the first supper in the folk’s new apartment, Mom mentioned Cara was missing, I could assure her that Cara WAS with us – we just couldn’t see her!
I have lost my sister, my friend, my mentor, my guide in life. Cara was, first of all, a little sister, then a friend. After adulthood, Cara became wiser than me and began guiding and mentoring me on a new road through life. How did a little sister become so wise?
Cara was clever, wise, witty, and downright funny. She made me laugh, she made me think, she made me do things I didn’t WANT to do. She left a hole in my heart, a hole in the family. I want her BACK!! I miss her so much!
Nine years is too long to be separated!